Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely
by Sky King Haruka Tenoh
Summary: -HIATUS- AU. After the death of her girlfriend, Haruka is devastated. Michiru comes back into her life, and things haven't changed. But what happens when someone from Michiru's past returns? Haruka/OC Michiru/OC Haruka/Michiru.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: A Japanese person owns Sailor Moon, I don't, so don't sue me. I don't own the Backstreet Boys song "Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely." If you don't like Haruka and Michiru pairing or don't like yuri fics or my fics don't waste your time flaming me because all you're doing if feeding my pet dragon Sparky.

Dedication: This story is dedicated to a person who stole my heart and shattered it to pieces, Jessica, even though you are gone and in a better place not by my side you always knew I loved you, but you were right and I did find someone else, but you'll always have a special place in my heart… I learned, the hard way, you can't always have what you want (love wise). Rest In Peace.

* * *

Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Prologue

Haruka's POV

It was just supposed to be a fun vacation. Just the two of us having a good time. But that utterly changed that summer night. Shinji, my lovely girlfriend, had suggested that we take a short vacation, to which I of course agreed. She had decided to go to the beach, it was one of her favorite places, and spend two weeks there…I can still remember that morning when she woke me up and sprung the idea on me. She had made the cutest face when she asked me that…her profound gray eyes and ebony black hair shone in the bright morning light. I can still remember the scent of her lavender perfume that would intoxicate me and lure me to her, it rendered me to her will, the way an enchantress mesmerizes you with a simple melody. But what I truly loved about her was…everything. Everything she did, everything she was, was simply astounding.

_…Oh, my dear Shinji, if only you knew how much I miss you and how my heart aches in this damned solitude…to wake every morning and realize that you aren't there by my side. How I wish I could make love to you once again and be perplexed by the sight of your beautiful body beneath me. My love, everyday that goes by is filled with melancholy and consuming grief…  
_  
On our last day at the beach we had gone out for a drive on the coast. the night was cool and calm, giving us a soothing feeling of happiness. We were admiring the beauty of the ocean under the moonlight. I can recall everything that happened as if it were yesterday.

As we drove back home, a driver lost control of his car and hit us straight forward. Everything that occurred that night is still buried in my memory, tormenting me, haunting my dreams. I wake up in the middle of the night drenched in cold sweat and I realize that nothing has changed…I remember the paramedics rushing us to the hospital. My injuries weren't so severe, I had a few cuts that were deep and were stitched up…but Shinji on the other hand wasn't so fortunate. The other driver had rammed into the passenger side of the car…and Shinji underwent an immediate surgery…after hours of waiting they took her to the intensive care area of the hospital. Shinji recovered consciousness the second day…and that same night she died. I let out a heart wrenching scream…I felt my world had fallen apart, the love of my life was now gone! God! How could this happen! We were supposed to always be together, live our lives in never ending happiness…and now she GONE! Gone never to come back! I shall never see her beautiful face or hear her melodic voice wake me up in the early mornings.

The doctors tried their best to bring her back…but all of their efforts were rendered useless. Nothing could be done…absolutely nothing.

The next day I was informed that the driver was drunk and under the influence of alcohol. His name was Jonathan and was sixteen years old. They say he was heavily intoxicated. He died at the site of the accident. I felt anger, hate and rage well up inside me. I despised him because he was responsible for the death of my girlfriend and my suffering…yet at the same time…I felt pity for him, not because I had forgotten what he had caused, but because he lived a short life and didn't know to appreciate it. He was young and had a life ahead of him but he ended it short because of his irresponsibility and foolish decision.

Now I stand before Shinji's grave wishing I could turn back time and change everything, but I'm only human and I don't posses such power. I laid some flowers on her grave and read the inscription on the marble stone:

Shinji Yamamoto  
From 1987 to 2002  
Beloved daughter, girlfriend, and sister.  
Even though you are gone your memory will always be in our hearts.

I kept staring and reading the engraved letters remembering her last words to me. "I love you now and forever…I want you to be happy again and not dwell in loneliness…find someone who will love just like I have loved you…I never know what I did to deserve you, but know that I will always feel lucky for the time we've had together, should I die right now, know that I will never regret one single moment of my time with you…for you are my heart and soul and nothing will change that…don't forget this love and please…never forget me…"

Tears burned in my eyes and I let the fall. "I will never forget you love…never… I don't know if I can move on and find someone else…" As I walked away I heard her voice in the wind whisper "Never forget me." I turned and saw nothing then I turned around again and walked away. I knew it was her voice carried by the wind, but that's all it was just a voice in the wind…

* * *

A/N: This is based on something that affected me very much…I started writing it right after Jessica's death but just now posting it. I hope you like the rest.


	2. Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely

Disclaimer: A Japanese person owns Sailor Moon, I don't, so don't sue me. I don't own the Backstreet Boys song "Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely." If you don't like Haruka and Michiru pairing or don't like yuri fics or my fics don't waste your time flaming me because all you're doing if feeding my pet dragon Sparky.

Dedication: This story is dedicated to a person who stole my heart and shattered it to pieces, Jessica, even though you are gone and in a better place not by my side you always knew I loved you, but you were right and I did find someone else, but you'll always have a special place in my heart… I learned, the hard way, you can't always have what you want (love wise).

* * *

Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Chapter 1: Show Me The Meaning of Being Lonely

_Show me the meaning of being lonely…  
So many words for the broken heart  
It's hard to see in a crimson love  
So hard to breathe  
Walk with me, and maybe  
Nights of light so soon become  
Wild and free I could feel the sun  
Your every wish will be done  
They tell me..._

Haruka walked inside her empty house that she used to share with her beloved. Her heart had been shattered to pieces by the one person who she loved the most, Shinji. They had decided to go on a trip to the beach…to have a pleasurable time and relax… yet, in the end it was disastrous and the cause of Haruka's tremendous heartache.

'Everything seems so empty without her.'

Haruka walked into 'their room'. Damn, it hurt so much to think that. A couple of weeks ago she would've been on that bed lying with Shinji in her arms, talking about their planned future of their endless love. But, now, Haruka stood in the doorway staring at the huge bed that she would have to sleep in and that would feel so empty without her girlfriend there by her side. The tall blonde walked towards the huge bed and laid on her side of it. Slowly, she leaned into the space Shinji used to occupy at one point, it still contained a faint aroma of the woman that used to lie there. Lying on her back now, Haruka started crying, she cried like never before in her entire life. Racking sobs shook her tall frame from the pain that came from the depths of her very soul.

_Show me the meaning of being lonely  
Is this the feeling I need to walk with  
Tell me why I can't be there where you are  
There's something missing in my heart...  
_  
Haruka cried herself to sleep, but, even in her dreams her painful memories became to strong to overcome. The tall blonde shifted in bed as her nightmares of a painful reality consumed her in her sleep.

_Shinji!_

_The paramedics….a hospital…blood…Wait…the accident. That fool…the impact…darkness…a full moon…doctors…_

_"Never forget me…"_

_"He's dead…he was sixteen…"_

_"I'm sorry….she's gone."_

_"Time of death…"_

_'Forever in our hearts'_

_She's gone…_

_N-Nooo! This can't be!  
_  
"Nooo!" Haruka woke up drenched in cold sweat. She looked around, nothing had changed. she was still alone surrounded by loneliness…

_Life goes on as it never ends  
Eyes of stone observe the trends  
They never say forever gaze  
Guilty roads to an endless love  
There's no control  
Are you with me now  
Your every wish will be done  
They tell me...  
_  
After weeks Haruka was still drowning herself in melancholy and disbelief. It was about 5:30 pm when her phone rang. Slowly and dreadfully she picked it up and answered.

"Hello." Haruka said with and empty tone.

"Ruka is that you?" came the other voice.

"Hai..." came the solemn reply.

"Haruka I heard what happened and I'm very sorry. I tried calling sooner but with the tour I haven't had a chance."

"It's alright…I still…it hurts so much…" Haruka said as tears filled her teal eyes.

"I understand….after all you love her and it's normal for you to feel this way. I miss her too…she was my friend and I cared about her…" she was briefly interrupted by Haruka.

"Michiru how soon could you be here…I need someone to talk to." the blonde said hesitantly.

"I'll be in town in about a week." Michiru replied softly.

After saying their good bye's they hung up and Haruka was again left alone.

_Show me the meaning of being lonely  
Is this the feeling I need to walk with  
Tell me why I can't be there where you are  
There's something missing in my heart...  
_  
Hours passed since Michiru's phone call and Haruka thought about how Michiru's words had helped her feel better…for a while at least. Haruka gave a heavy sigh and felt a small hint of relief knowing that in a week her friend would be there to console her, but in the meantime she would have to face her inner demons alone…and face the fact Shinji was gone. Walking to her room the tall blonde kept thinking about her lover and how she wished to be with her where she was. Slowly she walked to her nightstand and opened a drawer and pulled out a small knife…she thought about ending everything, but then something held her back….and Michiru came to her mind. What was she thinking her best friend promised to be there and she was already thinking about ending everything! No, besides she had made a promise to Shinji and no matter how difficult it was she would keep it…even if she couldn't find anyone to take her place…

_There's nowhere to run  
I have no place to go_

_Surrender my heart body and soul_  
_How can it be you're asking me to feel the things you never show  
You are missing in my heart  
Tell me why I can't be there where you are...  
_  
Haruka sat on her couch. She listened for something, a voice, she searched for the melodic voice of the woman that still held her heart even though she was dead. Reminiscing on past memories, Haruka remembered their trip to the country. The young blond remembered how Shinji had once said "…We are merely human, and our stay in this world isn't eternal….that's why it's important to make each day worth living because you never know the unexpected surprises destiny has in store…".

Haruka sighed, 'She was right…but my surprise cost me the one I loved the most in this cursed world'.

Standing up she walked to the balcony. It was now dark outside and the night sky was covered by a blanket of stars that shown dimly in the dark night. No longer did they shine brightly like they used to, even the moon seemed to share in Haruka's grief. A cool breeze swept across Haruka's face. Staring into the night sky Haruka couldn't help but think how many nights she and Shinji would stand their enjoying the comfort of each other's warm embrace. Now she stood alone watching her surroundings with an empty gaze. Nothing seemed to matter. A part of her died that day along with her beloved.

'Nobody will ever take your place in my heart Shinji…nobody…" and with that thought in mind Haruka walked back towards her empty bedroom.

_Show me the meaning of being lonely  
Is this the feeling I need to walk with  
Tell me why I can't be there where you are  
There's something missing in my heart..._

* * *

A/N: So what do you think about this chapter…I know it's not really good but honestly I can't believe I wrote this much so far. My finals are this week so it will be a few days before I update, unless of course I'm able to fit it into my busy schedule. I would love to hear from you. E-mail me or send me and instant message. Later.


	3. Michiru's Arrival

Disclaimer: A Japanese person owns Sailor Moon, I don't, so don't sue me. I don't own the Backstreet Boys song "Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely." If you don't like Haruka and Michiru pairing or don't like yuri fics or my fics don't waste your time flaming me because all you're doing is feeding my pet dragon Sparky.

Dedication: This story is dedicated to a person who stole my heart and shattered it to pieces, Jessica, even though you are gone and in a better place not by my side you always knew I loved you, but you were right and I did find someone else, but you'll always have a special place in my heart… I learned, the hard way, you can't always have what you want (love wise). Rest In Peace.

* * *

Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Chapter 2: Michiru's Arrival

A week had passed since the night that Michiru had first called, and Haruka had finished getting everything ready for her arrival. She had woken up very early to get a few things settled. Michiru had called the previous night informing Haruka that her flight would be arriving at about noon Tokyo time.

Haruka was anxious about Michiru's arrival; she hadn't realized until now the possible consequences of having a woman live with her once again. Haruka feared that having Michiru live with her could cause her to…no that wasn't possible.

'Michiru will awaken the feelings that you thought would be lost forever.' said a voice in the back of Haruka's mind.

'That won't happen.' Haruka yelled.

'Yes it will. Especially since you've known she's had feelings for you since junior high.'

'That was just a crush…she's most likely over it by now.' Haruka retorted.

'Don't lie to yourself…why else would you tell her you needed her.'

'I didn't mean it that way.' Haruka snapped back.

Haruka felt herself going crazy. She pushed off those insane thoughts. There was no possible way she could fall in love with her best friend…could there? The blond shook her head which made her hair messier. She turned and looked at the clock which read 10:45 am. She decided to head for the airport so she could make good time incase there was traffic. The blond racer got into her silver Ferrari and made her way towards Tokyo Airport [I have no idea what the actual airport is called, sorry] Haruka decided to listen to music to get her mind off of things so she put a mixed CD into the car stereo. After listening to it for a few minutes she turned off the music and concentrated on driving. Apparently there was a traffic jam causing the hold up of traffic. The young blond decided to sit and wait beside it was still about an hour before Michiru's plane arrived.

Haruka calmly waited in her car. Minutes passed and there was no sign of improvement. Finally, after almost half an hour Haruka realized what was the hold up. It was a car accident…Haruka felt her heart stop as she saw one of the cars…it was similar to the one she had been driving that dreadful night. The young racer felt her breathing become constricted as flashbacks from that night hit her full force too powerful to be held back.

_The BMW it rammed into my Lamborghini. Shinji…she was…the car it rammed into the passenger's side…I felt my head throb in pain and blood trickling from my injuries. I looked over and there she was…my dark haired angel covered in blood. Her svelte body leaning against the crumpled car door…her breathing was different as though if she were sleeping, but she wasn't…I realized she was unconscious. This couldn't be happening…it just couldn't. Things weren't supposed to end this way…not this night…not like this…_

The honking of a car behind her made Haruka snap out of her trance. She saw the police officer signal her to head towards another direction. The car that was behind her got ahead of her. The driver poked his head out the window and yelled, "Pay attention to where the hell you're going!" Haruka glared and shouted back, "Fuck off bastard!" With this the young blond kept on driving and turned on the music to clear her mind.

'That asshole probably has know idea what it's like to lose someone you love' she thought. As the CD changed tracks a song called 'My December' came up. The rhythm of the music reflected exactly how she felt…depressed and melancholic. If you took a moment and looked into those profound pools of green you would be able to see and feel the pain that dwells in Haruka's heart. After driving a few more minutes, the dashing racer arrived just in time at the airport. The tall blond searched for the right gate. Finally she found it, but apparently the plane was running a bit late. Haruka stood waiting to see if she saw any sign of her friend. After waiting about twenty minutes, Haruka's teal eyes caught glimpse of an aquamarine-haired girl. She immediately recognized who it was, it was Michiru Kaioh, her best friend.

Michiru stepped through the gate doors. The aquamarine-haired beauty looked around for a sign of her friend, who was supposed to come and pick her up. A small smile lit up her beautiful features when she saw a handsome, tall blonde walk towards her. They had been friends for many years, but for Michiru things were different. She loved Haruka, ever since they met. She loved everything about the young racer; her deep teal eyes that shine like polished emeralds, her sandy blonde hair, her strongly built form, everything; Michiru loved everything about her. Sometimes Michiru felt guilty; she felt guilty because she had introduced Haruka to Shinji. But then again that guilt was banished every time she thought Haruka was happy; although deep inside it pained her broken heart to know she could never have the dashing racer. Michiru snapped out of her thoughts when Haruka reached her.

"Hello Michiru." Haruka said in a deep voice.

"Hey Haruka," Michiru said as she wrapped her arms around her friend, "I'm so sorry about Shinji."

"It's okay Michiru." Haruka sighed.

Although Haruka tried to hide her feelings, Michiru knew Haruka lied. She knew Haruka's tactics for hiding her feelings to avoid being hurt. Although she knew Haruka was hurting, she decided not to push the subject that way she didn't seem imprudent. Haruka took Michiru's bags and let her out of the airport and to her car. While she loaded the bags in the car's trunk, Haruka thought about many things, primarily about Michiru.

"Haruka do you think you can take me to a hotel nearby while I look for a place to live?" Michiru asked.

"Absolutely not." Haruka replied with a slight smile.

Confused with Haruka's answer Michiru asked, "W-why not?"

Haruka gave her a friendly smile "Because," Haruka paused as a melancholic look took over her fine features, "because ever since…the accident…the house…has been really empty. I'd like you to come live there with…the house…its big enough. You can occupy one of the rooms, which ever you like. What do you say Michiru?" the blond said with an indefinable tone.

Michiru was left speechless. She didn't think she could handle living with Haruka, especially since she couldn't help loving her. The young violinist remained silent for about two minutes.

"I-I don't know…"

"Please say yes. Besides you wouldn't have to pay a hotel." the blond insisted.

Michiru sighed. "If you insist, but I wont be living there long."

"Thank you Michiru." and with that Haruka hugged Michiru and started to cry. Michiru hugged her back and whispered that everything would be okay. The blonde's tall frame shook as she cried and holding on to Michiru for her dear life. After a few minutes of crying Haruka leaned on Michiru and holding her tight. "Michiru you're the best friend anyone could ask for." Michiru frowned slightly. She knew she could never hope to be more than a friend to Haruka.

When Haruka stopped crying she wiped the tears from her eyes and straightened up. She opened the car door for Michiru to get in. As she walked to the other side of the car a perturbing thought embedded itself in Haruka's mind. With a small sigh she opened her door and got into the car. She started the car and revved up the engine. As she kept driving Haruka decided to take a detour to avoid the site of the accident she had previously passed earlier that day.

"Haruka." Michiru spoke softly.

"Yes." the blonde answered absentmindedly.

"I would like it if you took me to a flower shop." the young violinist said earning a confused look from Haruka. 'She looks cute when she's confused' Michiru thought to herself.

"What for?" Haruka asked.

"I want to take flowers to Shinji's grave if that's alright with you of course." Michiru said softly.

Heaving a heavy sigh, Haruka's frown turned into a slight smile, "Alright…I'll take you."

Haruka drove to a flower shop that was located near the cemetery where her girlfriend was buried. Michiru walked inside and pick beautiful flowers with bright colors. When she walked out Haruka was leaning against her car. They decided to walk to Shinji's grave because it wasn't far. Upon their arrival a small breeze picked up; they stood silent for a moment and continued walking until they found the grave they were looking for. Kneeling down Michiru placed the flowers on her friend's grave. She said a silent prayer and stood up. When she turned around she saw unshed tears form in Haruka's teal eyes. Michiru took her slender arms and held her friend as her reserves broke down and Haruka finally gave into her grief. Hot tears fell onto Michiru's shoulder, but she didn't care, all she cared was about the fact that Haruka was suffering and she felt useless because she couldn't do anything to ease Haruka's pain. After what seemed hours of crying Haruka held onto Michiru as if her life depended on it.

The sun was setting and dusk was drawing in. Both Haruka and Michiru decided it would be best to go and come back some other time. On their way to Haruka's house Michiru kept contemplating about many things that ran through her mind. At the same time Haruka drove barely keeping her attention on the road ahead. She had one hand on the steering wheel while she leaned her head on the other. The small voice in the back of her head came back tormenting her with incoherent thoughts.

'You see I told you…why else did you ask her to live with you."

'Because she has no where else to go and….' Haruka snapped back at the voice.

'And because you don't want to feel alone.'

'That's not true I would never..'

'C'mon Haruka you can't fight it. You want her there not just to keep you company but because…'

'Shut up! Shut up! That's not true I wouldn't hurt Michiru's feelings like that! She's my best friend…I cant hurt her like that and I won't…she deserves better. Besides what on earth makes you think I love her.'

'The fact that you constantly look at her from the corner of your eye.'

Haruka shook those thoughts out of her head making her sandy blond hair messier.

Michiru gave Haruka a concerned look. "Haruka are you alright?" she asked.

"Yes…yes…I'm fine."

'Liar.' Haruka's mind snapped at her.

Haruka turned her attention to her driving and drove towards her home. After driving a few more minutes they had arrived at a two story western style home. Michiru was left in awe of what was Haruka's house. There was a fountain in the middle of the large drive way. They got out of the car and Haruka took Michiru's bags out of the car's trunk and lead her inside the house after opening the door. Michiru walked in and immediately understood why Haruka had asked her to stay with her. The house was very spacious and at the same time felt very empty. She knew how it felt to just live with solitude as one's companion. The house seemed a bit gloomy, most likely because of the dark curtains. The young violinist heaved a heavy sigh upon realization of how difficult helping Haruka would turn out to be. She turned around to face Haruka. The blonde stood looking at her with those enchanting pools of green that captivated her and haunted her dreams every night. A small smile was drawn on Haruka's face as she said, "Welcome to your new home, Michiru."  


* * *

  
A/N: I'm so sorry I took so long to fix this chapter, but my girlfriend who is also my assistant, muse and editor has decided to go on vacation. I will be joining her soon so it may take a bit for me to update any time soon. Thanks for reading and having patience with me. Please review or e-mail me.


	4. Meeting Up With The Past

Disclaimer: Read other the other chapters. In few words I don't own anything except the plot. So don't sue me. And if you don't like Yuri fics or Haruka and Michiru pairing don't bother reading. And if you're going to flame me I'll just feed them to my pet dragon Sparky, so don't bother.

Dedication: As usual my dedication is to Jessica. But this time I have another important dedication and it's to my girlfriend. She is the love of my life and the girl of my dreams and I would give anything for her. I love you sweetheart. Te amo mi amor. Je t'aime mon amour. Aishiteru.

* * *

Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Chapter 3: Meeting Someone From The Past

The next morning Haruka woke up as usual, to the sound of her alarm clock. She opened her eyes and looked at the time, it read 7:45 am. The blonde racer got up from her bed and went to take a cold shower. Today was her first day back at the race track and she had to be ready for the upcoming season. When she stepped out of the shower she pulled on a pair of blue jeans, followed by a white t-shirt and then a black leather jacket. She grabbed her sunglasses and with a sigh left the room. As she headed for the front door she paused. For some odd and peculiar reason she felt the necessity to leave Michiru a note.

'Why on earth would she care if I stepped out, but…then again she's my friend and she's always worrying about me so…I'll leave a note so she doesn't get worried.' with that in mind, Haruka walked into her bedroom and pulled out a pen and notepad from her nightstand. She quickly jotted down a message on the note pad and tore the page out. She left her room with the note in hand and placed it on the coffee table in the middle of the living room. Heaving a sigh she finally walked out of her home and got into her Ferrari and sped off into the cool brisk morning.

* * *

Michiru's POV

I woke up from my profound sleep by the sound of my annoying alarm clock. I looked over and my clock read 9:30 am. Actually, it's not even mine. None of the things in this room are mine except for the things I brought with me from my trip. Everything else, including my heart, belongs to Haruka, my best friend and the love of my life. I just moved in with her last night and yet I feel like I'm at some stranger's house and not Haruka's home. Just last night, I had one of those dreams that constantly haunt my sleep every night. Even now I can recall the events of that dream. It's always the same dream.

_Haruka and I are in what appears to be a crystal room. She brings me close to her and we lock our lips in a passionate kiss. As we kiss we begin removing each other's clothing until we are completely naked. Haruka takes me into her strong arms and carries me to our bed and lays me down carefully placing my head to rest comfortably on the pillow. She straddles me with her body. She begins trailing kisses down my neck down to my breasts. After that the unbridled lovemaking that takes place makes me lose my senses and all trace of sanity as she takes me straight to heaven. In her arms I lose my innocence and gain the certainty of her never ending love…I can still picture how her graceful and perfect body writhes and trembles with fits of passion as I finally claim her as mine and lose myself between her legs tasting the sweet nectar that resides within her…_

When I wake up like now, my body is on fire and aching for her soft touch. Dear gods, I'm going to end up losing control. And I don't know what to do. Haruka holds my heart and she doesn't realize that sooner or later I won't be able to contain myself anymore. Especially since now I have her so close…

I get up and out of bed and go to take an ice cold shower to get my mind off of such thoughts. Minutes later I emerge from the bathroom and pick something to wear for my rehearsal. Once I'm dressed and ready, I make my bed and walk out of the bedroom. As I make my way to the kitchen, I catch a glimpse of a piece of paper of the coffee table. It was from Haruka so I picked it up and read it.

_Michiru,_

_I'll be at the track training for my upcoming races. I won't be home until noon, so don't worry about me. In case you need to reach me just call my cell. Take care._

_Haruka Tenoh_

Well, I might as well leave her a note saying I'll be at rehearsal. I quickly write a small note and then walk to the kitchen to get some breakfast. I get some rolls and put marmalade on them. I also got a glass of orange juice. After finishing my breakfast I grab my violin case and my purse and leave locking the door behind me. As I walk outside I see Haruka's car pull up to the drive way. She gets out of the car and runs towards me, her sandy blond hair messed up and slightly sweaty.

"Hey Michiru. Where are you going?" she immediately asked.

I was taken a bit surprised. "I'm going to my rehearsal. I have to be there in about an hour." I replied.

"Good thing I found you just in time." she said.

"Why?" I asked.

She reached into her pocket and pulled out a set of keys and handed them to me. "Haruka, what are these for?" I asked slightly confused.

Haruka gave me a friendly smile and said, "Those are your car keys along with your house key, of course. How else would you get into the house if you don't have a key? Besides, sometimes, I don't have a defined schedule of arrival, so you would be waiting forever for me to get here. And the car keys, well you need a way of getting around so…yeah. Oh, one more thing. There's a surprise along with the car."

"Thank you Haruka." I said bowing slightly in gratitude. But, now I wondered what the surprise was.

"It was no problem. I'm having my Maserati brought over. It should be here in about five minutes." she said looking a bit distracted.

She started asking me about how things had been going for me since we last saw each other to which I said that everything was alright. Just as we kept talking, a black Maserati pulled up behind Haruka's silver Ferrari.

Haruka smiled and said, "And there's your car along with your surprise."

A man with the same build as Haruka stepped out of the car and walked towards us. Yet, somehow, he seemed slightly familiar with that small scar above his left eyebrow. He had black hair styled just like Haruka's except in a more juvenile style. He was wearing black baggy jeans with a black belt with a silver buckle, a white shirt, a black leather jacket and black leather Polo shoes. When he finally reached us he smiled and greeted us. At first, I thought Haruka was trying to set me up with the guy until she said, "Michiru you remember my cousin Leo don't you?"

I gasped in shock. That was Haruka's cousin. She had changed so much. I sincerely thought she was a guy. After a few seconds I replied, "Yes, I do remember her."

It seemed like forever since I had last seen her, and she wasn't the same as all those years ago. It was disappointing that all that could come out of my mouth was, "Wow you really changed Leo. The last time I saw you still hair down to your shoulders."

Like I said pathetic first lines. However, I was truly happy to see her again. She was my confidante. I told her about how I felt towards Haruka. In fact, she helped me deal with my sadness when I found out Haruka was going out with Shinji. I still remember that when she was about to leave for Spain she told me she was in love with me, even though she knew my heart belong to her cousin, and she promised we'd see each other again. And here she was again after an absence of seven long years. I couldn't help it and I embraced her in a bear hug. She chuckled a bit surprised and hugged me back.

"Hey Michi." she said in her comforting husky voice. Unshed tears burned in my eyes and I let them fall freely. She held me tighter. "Hey Michi, don't cry." she broke the hug and looked into my eyes with her blue-gray eyes. "Don't cry. I don't like seeing those beautiful blue eyes crying." Leo said wiping away my tears. She turned to face Haruka.

"Hey Haruka, I'll stop by for my car later. Michiru and I have a lot to talk about." Leo said slightly cheerful.

"Hey Leo, is Masara with you?" Haruka asked.

"Masara?" I questioned.

Leo nodded as she rubbed the back of her head while blushing. "It's not who or what you're thinking." she replied shyly, "You remember my twin?" I nodded, "Well, it's her fiancé. She had never been to Tokyo and I thought it would be nice to let her tag along, while Alexis finishes a few pending things in Spain." I smiled, and for some reason I felt relieved that there was no real relationship with this girl.

Haruka cleared her throat. "Michiru, I have to get going and it's getting late for your rehearsal." she said her voice turning serious.

Then it hit me. I had rehearsal in half an hour and I was going to be late. I said good bye to Haruka and headed for the car. Leo walked to it and opened the passenger door for me. I looked at her confused by her actions.

"I'll drive you there. I kinda picked up a few tricks on speed from Ruka." Leo said with a charming smile.

We got into the car and left after Haruka was already gone. On our way to the music hall I couldn't help but notice Leo seemed worried. She leaned her chin on her hand while her other hand remained on the steering wheel. Her black hair got messier as the wind tousled it as she continued to drive. As we kept driving, Leo spoke in a serious tone of voice, "Michiru what happened between Shinji and Haruka?" she asked. I looked at her for a moment.

"You mean, Haruka didn't tell you?" I asked.

"Tell me what?" she replied.

"About Shinji." I said a bit concerned.

"What happened? Did they fight or something?" when she asked that I knew Haruka had not mentioned Shinji's death to Leo. I remained silent. Soon we arrived at the music hall. I told her that we could talk about it later.

"Hey Michiru what time will you get out?" she asked me.

"At two o' clock. Why do you ask?"

"Well, I was wondering if I could borrow your car since Masara's flight will be arriving soon. I'll be back before you're done with rehearsal?"

I giggled. After all I trusted her so I said it was alright, as long as she was there to pick me up, to which she agreed. I walked inside the elegant building and greeted my fellow comrades. We began rehearsing for our upcoming concert here in Tokyo. For the next hours I could keep Haruka out of my mind, at least for the meantime.

* * *

Haruka's POV

Haruka headed back to the track. At the same time she was having an annoying argument with her conscious.

'Admit it you are jealous that Michiru was talking to Leo.'

'Shut up damn it!'

'C'mon Haruka you think you can fool me, I'm your conscious for goodness sake.'

'…I'm not jealous'

And so the argument kept going until Haruka arrived back at the track. She got out of her car and stood by it looking at the race track. Now she realized how empty her life would be from now on. Usually, it would have been Shinji in the stands cheering her to go for another victory, or she would surprise Haruka by sneaking into the locker room and take her by surprise. Now all of that was gone and Haruka felt herself sink into emptiness.

"Moving on will be so hard Shinji…I just don't know if I can." Haruka said into thin air. She looked up into the sky. "Please, help me Shinji. If you're listening to me…please help me find my path…help me go on with my life." tears started flowing from Haruka's eyes.

'I have only solitude now and a gray picture of a painful memory. What hurts the most is this confusion because ever since you left nothing has been the same. I miss you because your memory lives within me… I have tried to forget and I can't… I love you and it seems as if there's no hope for me. I have lost you and everything even my identity. You showed me the extent of love and passion, but you never taught me to say good bye…I've learned now that you are gone… What will happen with me Shinji…what will happen…' and with those last thoughts in mind Haruka wiped away her tears and went back to continue with her training.

* * *

Hours Later…

Just as promised Leo arrived just a few minutes before Michiru's rehearsal was over. As she sat in the car waiting, a concerned look marked her features. Heaving a sigh she turned to look away from her friend, Masara. She was a very beautiful young woman. Masara had brown hair and hazel eyes.

"What's wrong Leo?" Masara asked, not being one to easily be fooled.

Leo averted her gaze.

"Talk to me." Masara said making the tomboy look up, "It's just… well… it has to do with my cousin. I think something happened between her and Shinji."

"Why do you say that?" Masara asked.

"Well, I asked Michiru what was up with Haruka…and she asked me if Haruka hadn't told me yet. So I asked her if Haruka told me what and she said it was about Shinji. And when I wanted to ask her what happened it was already time for her rehearsal." Leo replied.

"Maybe you can ask her about it once she comes out."

"You're right." just as she was through talking Michiru walked out of the building.

The dark-haired tomboy got out and opened the door for Michiru. The violinist got into the car and saw a girl in the backseat. Michiru smiled and stayed silent. Leo got into driver's seat and started the car. Leo smiled and spoke to Michiru, "Michiru this is Masara, Alexis fiancé, the girl who finally made her settle down."

Michiru looked at the girl sitting in the backseat and said, "It's a pleasure to meet you. My name is Michiru Kaioh."

Masara smiled shyly and replied "It's a pleasure to meet the famous violinist Michiru Kaioh. I've heard so much about you from Leo."

They talked a little, but the most of the remaining drive to Haruka's house was really silent except for the sound of the car and traffic. After a few minutes they arrived at Haruka's house. Leo pulled up to the driveway and parked the car. Michiru opened the door and invited Leo and Masara to walk inside. They sat in the living room chatting and talking about old times and doing a little bit of catching up after so many years. Just as they continued talking Haruka walked in through the front door.

"Hello everyone." she said a bit coldly.

"Is everything alright Haruka?" Michiru asked.

"Yeah…I'm fine just a little tired." Haruka answered as she walked upstairs to her room.

"I wonder what's wrong with her?" Masara asked pulling a strand of hair behind her ear.

Leo shrugged and gave a serious look. "I'll go talk to her." she replied as she too disappeared upstairs. Michiru and Masara were left alone in the living room.

"So, how did you and Alexis meet?" Michiru asked.

"Well I met her through Leo. I arrived to Spain shortly after Leo had moved there. We were in same high school and had some classes together. Well after a while I kept running into her very frequently and I thought my mind was playing tricks on me. Well one day, I stayed after school and I saw the both of them talking in the hallway. I was confused at first, but then I understood the personality changes. Leo was the one who was more reserved and serious, and Alexis was the one that kept staring at me in the hallway trying to flirt with me."

"How long have you two been together?" Michiru questioned.

"We got together after our senior year, so we've been together almost three years." Masara replied. They continued talking about high school. Pretty soon the conversation changed and instead talked about their dreams and aspirations.

Meanwhile, Leo stood outside Haruka's door. "Haruka can I talk to you for a second?" the tomboy asked.

"Hai." came a faint reply. Leo walked in and saw Haruka was sitting on her bed with her legs crossed and tears flowing from her teal eyes.

"Haruka, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Leo asked as she sat next to her dear cousin and took one of Haruka's hands into hers. Haruka didn't answer. "Is this about Shinji?" the black haired tomboy asked. Haruka let out a soft sob and Leo squeezed her cousin's hand. "Haruka, talk to me please." Leo pleaded.

"She's gone Leo! She's gone forever!" Haruka cried. Leo pulled her cousin into a hug.

"She's dead Leo." Haruka sobbed.

"But how? What happened?" Haruka's cousin asked.

Haruka pulled back and wiped her tears. "We had gone for a small vacation and one night we had an accident with a drunk driver…Shinji died the next morning." Haruka said softly in a barely audible voice.

"Gomen nasai Haruka." Leo whispered. "If there is anything I can do please let me know."

"Arigato." Haruka said quietly. Both cousins sat there in silence. Neither saying a word the only sounds that could be heard were Haruka's soft sobs. Leo could only hold her cousin hoping and praying for things to get better for the blonde tomboy.

After Haruka cried until she could cry no more, she walked into the bathroom and washed her face erasing all traces of her tears. Apparently things weren't what Leo had expected. After drying up Haruka walked out and Leo smiled at her, "I guess we better get down stairs. The girls are probably waiting for us." with that said both 'guys' walked downstairs and into the living room.

Haruka sat across from Michiru and Leo sat beside Masara. "Hey man, how about we take these girls out for lunch?" Leo asked Haruka.

Haruka nodded. "I'm kind of hungry too you know." the blonde replied.

"That settles it. Let's go eat." Leo said cheerfully.

Haruka pulled out her wallet and looked at her cousin. "I gotta get back to racing." she said flushing a little.

"Don't worry I'm buying." her cousin replied.

Finally everyone stood up and walked out the door. As they walked outside a grin formed on Leo's face.

"My car! Arigato Haruka for bringing it here." she said enthusiastically. All four girls agreed on which place to go.

Haruka and Michiru left in Haruka's Ferrari and Leo and Masara left in Leo's dark gray Lamborghini. Michiru felt a little tense at being alone with Haruka in the car. Haruka's teal eyes averted their gaze to the road ahead of her. Finally, after a bit of silence Haruka spoke, "How was your rehearsal?" she asked.

"It was alright." Michiru replied.

"What about you Haruka?" Michiru asked.

Haruka gave a silent sigh "It went well." she answered. The rest of the drive remained silent and all of the sudden Michiru regretted moving in with Haruka.

* * *

A/N: I'm so sorry for the long delayed update. Gomen nasai. But here's the third chapter revised. I decided to re-write it, I wasn't satisfied with the way I wrote it last. Hope you enjoyed it.


	5. Realization

Disclaimer: Read other the other chapters. In few words I don't own anything except the plot. So don't sue me.

Dedication: As usual my dedication is to Jessica. But this time I have another important dedication and it's to my girlfriend. She is the love of my life and the girl of my dreams and I would give anything for her. I love you sweetheart.  


* * *

  
Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Chapter 4: Realization

Haruka's POV

It's been almost two months since Shinji passed away…yet the memory of that ominous night remains within me, taking its toll on my dying soul. I stand before Shinji's grave with some flowers in my hands. I set them down and allow some tears to fall. it is there with a vague empty look on my face that I think of what once was. As I sit there I recall Shinji's last words to me.

"…_I want you to be happy again and not dwell in loneliness…find someone who will love just like I have loved you…"_

After a while I come to the conclusion that I can't keep hanging on to this feeling anymore. I loved Shinji, and still do, but she's gone and I know she won't come back. I have to let go and move on with my life. Even though I am aware that no one can ever replace her in my heart, I have to find someone who can banish this loneliness and this emptiness that dwells in the deep recesses of my heart.

I feel a warm breeze embrace me as I stand amongst the graves of those gone. The breeze embraces me and sweeps away any doubt from my mind. It feels almost as if Shinji were the one holding me in her arms and telling me everything will be ok and reassuring me that I am doing the right thing.

I turn to walk away and head towards my car. Shinji will forever be in my heart, but it is time for me to love once again. I get into my car and start the car listening to it roar to life. A final tear falls from my eye and I drive away, leaving and heading to a new chapter in my life's journey.

The sun is setting it's gold and orange hues mixing as the shadowy hues of dusk that shall soon draw upon the city of Tokyo bringing night with it. I sped away heading towards my home and my friend Michiru who waits for me there and has had patience with me and my melancholic turmoil for the past two months.

Now is my chance for a second chance, a fresh start, and a new beginning.

* * *

A/N: I'm so so so sorry for taking so long update. I've been going through some things that stopped me from updating. I suffered more losses to the angel of death amongst other things. Hopefully, I will be able to update soon. Gomen if this chapter really sucks, I'll try to make the next one better.


	6. Unexpected Actions and Sudden Decisions

Disclaimer: Read other the other chapters. In few words I don't own anything except the plot. So don't sue me.

Dedication: As usual my dedication is to Jessica. But this time I have another important dedication and it's to my girlfriend. She is the love of my life and the girl of my dreams and I would give anything for her. I love you sweetheart.

* * *

Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Chapter 5: Unexpected Actions and Sudden Decisions

Michiru stood outside of Haruka's house observing the sunrise. As she stood there her thoughts drifted; Haruka came to her mind. The violinist had decided to stay and help Haruka deal with her pain. Yet, three months have passed since she moved in and Michiru noticed little change. Lately, she had been thinking about moving out and getting her own place. She thought of how maybe being away from Haruka could help her forget these feelings that consumed her.

'Why after all this time can't I let go of these feelings for her?' Michiru asked her self as she closed her eyes. As she turns to walk back inside she lets out an exasperated sigh. The aquamarine haired goddess made her way to her room and collapsed onto the bed. Although it was still early she decided to sleep for a little while.

Not an hour passed before her cell phone rang making her heart almost jump out of her chest. She opened her eyes and gave a tired sigh as she made her way to answer the call.

"Hello."

"Michiru, it's me Leo." came the excited cheerful voice from the other end of the phone.

A smile formed on Michiru's lips, Leo was the only one who really understood her and did everything in her power to ease Michiru's pain for her unrequited love and steal a smile or a laugh from the beautiful violinist.

"Hey Leo. How are you doing?" she inquired, curious to know what had her friend so cheerful and excited.

"I'm doing great." came the reply, "Guess what Michi?"

Michiru giggles a little, "What? You know I'm not a psychic."

"Alexis is coming to visit!" Leo half shouted happily.

"Really? When?" the sea goddess asked enthusiastically.

"Today. Her flight gets here in about two hours." the tomboy's voice becomes shy and quiet, "I…I was wondering…if you can, you know…go with me and Masara to the airport to…" the nervousness was quite evident in her voice.

"Of course I'll go." Michiru replied easing away the other girl's nervousness.

"Cool. I'll pick you up in about an hour." both said their good-byes and Michiru hung up the phone. She went to get ready. Nothing much was need just a little brush of her hair and that was it.

An hour later a familiar Lamborghini pulled up into the driveway. Michiru quickly jot down a note telling Haruka she'd most likely be at Leo's house for the remainder of the day. With that she turned to leave and locked the door behind her. Leo was waiting with the car door open for her to get in. Michiru seated herself in the backseat and finally Leo brought the car's engine to life speeding through the streets of Tokyo quickly arriving at the airport. Leo, Masara, and Michiru patiently waited for Alexis' plane to arrive. An hour passed and nothing and the dark-haired tomboy was growing impatient as the minutes went by.

"Where the hell is she. She's an hour late?" she thought aloud while pacing for about eleven steps then turning and repeating the same actions.

"Relax, she'll be here. Besides I'm the one that should be panicking, she is my fiancée after all, you know." Masara said in a calm, consoling voice.

"Masara is right, Leo, calm down. And stop pacing you're driving me crazy and you'll make a hole on the floor from pacing so much." just as Michiru finished speaking, Leo nearly jumped out of her skin as someone covered her eyes.

"Guess who?" came an all to familiar voice; it sounded just like Leo.

Leo chuckled and lightly elbowed the person behind her. "Alexis, you jerk." she uncovered her eyes and turned to the person who was her mirror image. Leo hugged her twin then pulled her over to where her fiancé waited for her. Alexis looked at Michiru and the look in her eyes changed as she knew who the woman in front of her was. A hint of displease shone in her eyes.

"Alexis, you remember Michiru, right?"

She walked up to her and took her hand and placed a kiss on top of it. "Of course." Alexis said swallowing her pride, "How could I ever forget Michiru Kaioh."

'The girl whose caused your pain and heartache, Leo' Alexis thought to herself.

As Michiru looked up she saw a hint of hatred coming from Alexis that sent chills down all over her body. Alexis looked away and walked towards her fiancé and gave her kiss.

"Did you miss me?" Masara whispered seductively.

"You know I did." Alexis said as her gaze softened up and she embraced her girlfriend.

"Hey, enough of the mushy stuff. You two kiss and make out in front of everyone like nobody cares." Leo said wit a light giggle.

"You're one to talk bro, when was the last time you kissed or embraced a girl." Alexis turned her gaze directly at Michiru as her words became cold daggers aimed to hurt. "Tell me. When was the last time you had a woman in your bed." Leo stopped cold. "How long has it been Leo, oh that's right. Seven years. I bet you're still a virgin. It's a shame you know, wasting your youth on unrequited love. Take a chance and settle down with someone worth it. Quit chasing fantasies." Alexis said her voice cold with hatred towards the violinist that hid behind Leo's shadow, as Michiru realized that during all this time she had inflicted a terrible heartache and loneliness on Leo's existence. That after all this time Leo had not moved on as she had thought.

"Alexis shut up. You don't know what you're talking about." Leo said hiding the hurt in her eyes.

"Do I ever…" Alexis looks at her sister, "Let's go this is conversation is for another time."

"Alexis that's enough sweetheart," Masara whispered trying to calm Alexis down before she said anything else. "I know you hate her, but this isn't the time or the place. Give her a chance. Get to know her first before you jump to conclusions and start pointing fingers." at this Alexis nodded and quietly started walking towards the airport's exit. Leo and Michiru trailed behind the young couple.

"I'm terribly sorry if she offended you. She's naïve and doesn't know what she is talking about." Leo said apologetically knowing how the situation must have upset Michiru.

"It's not your fault. Quite honestly I don't think she likes me at all. She looks at me so coldly."

"She just hasn't had the opportunity to get to know you yet. She'll change her mind." Leo said giving Michiru a warm smile.

The four of them headed out into the parking lot and began making their way back home.

When they arrived at Leo's house, Masara showed Alexis to their room upstairs while Michiru and Leo stayed in the living room. They sat across form each other, Michiru averting her gaze to the floor and Leo's eyes remaining firmly on Michiru.

"Want to tell me what's bothering you? If it's about what Alexis said at the airport, then I apologize to you again." Leo spoke in a stern yet soft voice.

"It's not that." came a faint answer.

"Then, what's wrong?"

"Nothing…it's nothing…" Michiru lied. As she kept replaying Alexis' words in her mind.

Leo moves to sit next to her and takes her hand looking her deep blue eyes, "Tell me what's wrong." kisses her hand reassuringly, "You know I'm here for you, Michi."

Michiru gives a sigh, "I just don't know what to do or where to go to from here."

"Well," Leo began, "you know Haruka needs time. It won't be easy for her to seek a new relationship."

Michiru gives her a sad smile and looks away. "It's not about Ruka"

"Then what is it?"

"It's nothing to be concerned about." came her faint reply.

"Hey if you need a change of environment you are more than welcome to stay here." Leo said smiling and rubbing her back.

"Thank you, Leo. But, I don't think that Alexis would allow it."

"It's my house and I say it's fine for you to stay." with that said, Michiru embraced her dear friend and clung to her and cried hot tears into her shoulder. Leo responded by rubbing her back trying to calm her down. After a few minutes Michiru calmed a bit, only a small sob escaping her once in a while. Leo made a motion and wiped away Michiru's tears.

"I told you. I don't like to see you cry." Leo said with a soft look in her eyes.

Michiru smiled witnessing how much Leo cared for her, without regret or shame she placed a light kiss on her cheek, lingering there feeling the comfort in their closeness. At that moment Michiru felt something she'd never felt before. She felt a longing to remain in Leo's arms, to stay there where she was safe from everyone and everything. She remained there taking in Leo's essence and Leo's comforting words seemed to ease away any doubts or pains.

'I don't remember Haruka making me feel this way.' Michiru thought confused as to why she had these sudden feelings. She broke out of her dreamy state when she heard Masara and Alexis coming down the stairs laughing and giggling, she withdrew and sat next to Leo.

Masara walked to the kitchen and got some drinks, just as she walked back there was a knock on the door. She left the drinks on the counter and went to open the door. Standing at the doorway was Haruka.

"Please Haruka, come in." said Masara as she motioned the racer to walk in, "Would you like something to drink?"

"No thanks." came Haruka's reply. She stormed towards the living room, anger and frustration clearly evident in her features.

"Michiru where the hell have you been?" Haruka yelled taking Michiru and twin tomboys by unexpected surprise.

Michiru looked at Haruka with disbelief while Leo stood up and spoke to the blond racer.

"Haruka calm down will you. I asked Michiru to accompany us when we went to pick up Alexis from the airport. There's no need for you to come in here yelling at her." the dark haired tomboy spoke calmly but at the same time made her point very clear.

Haruka stumbled her way towards her cousin and continued shouting. It was then that Leo noticed, by the fowl smell coming from Haruka; she was drunk. Haruka gave Leo a glare as she spoke, "I can yell at whoever the hell I want and do as I please. Now get out of my way!" that said, the blond punched Leo square in the face before shoving the dark haired tomboy to the ground.

"Haruka, knock it off!" Alexis shouted grabbing Haruka's arm tightly.

"Haruka please stop." Michiru implored. In her drunk state Haruka pushed Michiru hard into the ground.

"I told you to knock it off Haruka!" Alexis shouted as the slammed the tall blond into the wall.

"Who's gonna make me?" the blonde asked as she punched Alexis in the face.

"Me!" that said Alexis punched Haruka in the stomach. The blond racer lost her breath and nearly fell to her knees, before she could react in any way Alexis punched her in her face nearly breaking her nose. The tall blond fell unconscious to the ground with thin stream of crimson blood flowing from her nose.

The dark haired tomboy wiped a small trickle of blood that ran from her lip. Her gaze was cold and stern but a little softened up as she looked at Michiru hurt.

"Michiru…are you alright?" Alexis asked as she offered Michiru a hand.

Michiru withdrew and stood up looking depressed, "I'm fine..."

Looking a bit down Alexis walked to wards her sister and helped her up.

"Hey man, are you okay?"

Leo wiped the blood from her lip, "Yeah, I'm fine…"

Masara walked into the room after all the commotion had ceased. She was surprised to find her girlfriend and her sister hurt, but she was even more shocked to see Haruka lying on the floor.

"What happened?" Masara asked as she walked in.

"Nothing…but I think we all need to call it a night." Leo replied quietly looking at Michiru who looked like an empty shell. "Alexis, help me carry Haruka to one of the guest rooms upstairs."

Alexis did as her sister asked without complain. Masara took a seat next to the violinist who had no consolation for what had just happened. Michiru let out a sigh and got up and left Masara sitting in the living room. The aquamarine haired beauty made her way out of the house without of word of where she was heading.

Just as she walked out of the house Leo came downstairs and didn't see Michiru anywhere. "Where's Michiru?" the tomboy asked Masara.

"She left and didn't say where she was going." Masara replied quietly. Leo grabbed a coat and walked out of the living room and out the front door. Leo ran down the street and spotted Michiru walking and shivering.

"Michiru." the tomboy called out as she rushed towards her. Michiru stopped and turned to look at Leo running towards her. Leo finally reached her a little out of breath.

"Michi, what are you thinking walking outside in the cold," the tomboy said as she took off her jacket and placing it on Michiru's shoulder, "You could get hurt out here."

"I didn't think that it was appropriate for me to stay with you after what happened." the violinist said in a barely audible voice.

"Nonsense, don't say that," Leo said putting an arm around her as she guided Michiru back towards her house. "When we get home just relax and we'll talk about what happened tomorrow." Leo stopped her and made Michiru look into her eyes. "Promise me you are not going to leave and wander about by yourself." Michiru's pools of blue locked with Leo's blue-gray eyes. "I promise."

With those two words said both Leo and Michiru walked back to the house. Tomorrow would be a new day, but for now, it was best to get some sleep and relax.

"Leo," came a whisper.

"Yes."

"I don't want to sleep alone tonight. I've been sleeping alone for so long. Please, can I sleep with you just for tonight." came the quiet request.

Leo looked at the aquamarine beauty and felt her heart catch in her throat. She didn't know what to say, but Michiru seemed to really be needing someone to comfort her. She wasn't sure if it was a good idea, but without thinking the words came out of her mouth.

"Sure, you can sleep with me tonight."

Michiru smiled a little. Soon they arrived at Leo's house. They walked in and headed upstairs. Leo opened the door and let Michiru walk inside.

"I'll go get some clothes for you." Leo said quietly as she turned to leave.

Michiru sat on the bed, which was very comfortable. She sat there looking at her surroundings. The room was accented with a Spanish touch to it. The room felt warm and romantic. She looked at the nightstand and saw a picture of her and Leo there. They were young back then, but in that picture Leo's love for her shown brightly just as it still did now after seven long years. She picked up the picture and remembered those days back then, and also the day Leo left. Just then Leo walked into the room.

"I found some clothes for you. Masara said you could keep them." Leo said breaking the silence and laying them next to Michiru. Leo realized Michiru had been looking at the picture.

"You kept it after all this time?" the violinist asked softly.

"Yeah I did. I couldn't let it go. It's all I had left of you." Leo whispered in the dark.

Michiru smiled warmly at Leo and went into the bathroom to change. In the meantime, Leo sat on the bed and let out a deep breath and got ready for bed. She wore her usual sleeping pants and t-shirt.

"Please God, don't let me do something stupid." she whispered in the dark.

Leo got under the covers and was about to fall asleep, when she heard Michiru coming out of the bathroom and getting into the bed. Michiru lay next to her and sought Leo's embrace. Leo responded by putting her arms around her. The day had been long and they wanted to sleep. They lay there quietly as sleep began taking over. Michiru enjoyed this feeling. She felt alive, as if her heart was beginning to live again. She once thought she could never love anyone else besides Haruka, but little did she know how her heart would change once Leo showed up. For now she pushed all thoughts aside as she rested comfortably in Leo's arms drifting into a quiet sleep.

* * *

A/N: I know it has taken me a very long time to update this story, but most unfortunately I have had many things to deal with. I do apologize for making you all wait this long. I changed the chapter a bit. I hope you like it… Thank you all so much for waiting patiently. Like always, please R&R. Thanks


	7. Broken Hopes

Disclaimer: Read other the other chapters. In few words I don't own anything except the plot. So don't sue me.

Dedication: As usual my dedication is to Jessica. But this time I have another important dedication and it's to my girlfriend. She is the love of my life and the girl of my dreams and I would give anything for her. I love you sweetheart. An additional dedication is to all those who have reviewed this and waited in eternal patience for an update.

* * *

Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Chapter 6: Broken Hopes

The next morning came with sunlight creeping through the blinds of Leo's room. Michiru was the first to wake up from her deep slumber. She still couldn't believe what Haruka had done the night before, nor could she understand why she asked Leo to her stay with her. She felt guilty at the moment, she didn't want to play with Leo's emotions. She tried to move, but she soon realized Leo's arm was around her waist apparently it had been that way since they fell asleep.

'She held me all night long…' she thought to herself. The sea goddess turned without breaking the embrace and looked at the sleeping tomboy. Leo looked so peaceful. Her dark locks of hair were messed up a little, and her facial features were smooth and peaceful. Even with the shirt she was wearing, Michiru could see Leo's well defined taught arm muscles and she was tempted to touch them. She let her fingers trace Leo's muscular arms and run up and down on them. Leo let a sleepy grunt and Michiru stopped thinking she had woken her up. A few seconds of silence passed and she heard nothing.

'I never thought I'd get to see her like this…' she thought as she kept admiring Leo's sleeping form. 'But why is it that she still loves me…after all this time…after all I've hurt her…' Michiru's thoughts were interrupted by light knocking on the door. She felt Leo moving and pretended she was asleep. The knocks grew a little louder.

"Leo. Are you awake?" came Alexis' voice on the other side of the door. Michiru tensed up a little. Leo stirred a little more and finally woke up.

"Yeah, I'm up." Leo said in a groggy voice. "Come in." she said, her arm still wrapped securely around Michiru's thin 'sleeping' frame. Alexis opened the door and walked in.

"I came to-" Alexis stopped as she saw who was sleeping next to her twin. Her voice became a little stern. "What is _she_ doing here?"

Leo looked at Michiru, "Alexis, it's not what it looks like."

"It isn't what it looks like," Alexis voice was a whisper as to not wake Michiru, "Are you listening to yourself," she continued, "This girl…you've loved her unconditionally for so long. Now I find her in your bed what do you expect me to think. I can't believe you stooped so low to be a one nightstand, you know she doesn't love you."

Michiru lay there in silence listening to what was being said.

"I didn't have sex with her you idiot…I know my place, I know she just wants friendship from me, but I'm not going to turn my back on her when she needs me. And I'm not a little child for you to tell me what to do." Leo's voice was quiet but firm.

"You've always been stubborn. "

"You're always a smart ass. Just leave it be. Just know that last night my heart felt content, even when nothing happened between us. The feeling of having her in my arms was enough."

"Leo, you're my sister, and I'd hate to see you broken again because of her. What is it about her that captivates you? What is it about her that makes you kneel like a dog to her? Tell me something, where was she when you needed her most? Where was she when you felt there was no reason for anything anymore? She was no where. She didn't care. I bet you in all these years she didn't think of you, she thought of Haruka. All theses years that is who she has cared about. And like then and now you will always be second place, you will always just be a shoulder to cry on." Alexis' words struck a nerve and she knew it.

Michiru couldn't believe what she was hearing and she wanted to cry at what she was hearing.

"You want to know what captivates me, it's her entire being. And I don't kneel like a dog. You remember how you felt when you met Masara, she's all you talked about. It's the same thing. The only difference is that you were lucky to be loved in return."

"But-"

"I am aware that I am not the one that her heart beats for. I know I'm not the reason she has sleepless night or the one she longs for. I know that quite clearly. In the worlds' eyes and yours I might just be second place or her shoulder to cry on, but no matter what, always and forever I will love her, no matter what anyone says."

Alexis' voice and gaze became soft, "I just don't find it fair to you. I don't find it fair that you would give everything for her. You're sacrificing yourself, your happiness, just for her. She has done nothing in return. I want to see you happy. I want to see you with a girl who will love you and respect you. I don't want you ending alone and holding on to a love that never will be. Now that Haruka's alone, do you honestly think she'll still come to you?"

"I don't know… Alexis, I can't find a girl and give her false hopes and a false love, things are better as they are. I don't want to hurt anyone." Leo said looking at the 'sleeping' girl in her arms. "Alexis, I love her…I wish you could understand…"

Alexis started walking out, "I do…believe me I do."

"Before you go, what is it you wanted to say?" Leo asked.

"Our concert is tonight."

"Is the band ready."

"Yes, they'll be arriving shortly." with those final words Leo's twin walked away closing the door behind her.

Haruka lay in one of the guest rooms wrestling with uneasy sleep. It didn't help that even in her dormant state she felt a migraine and pain on her face. After struggling to keep sleeping, Haruka woke up and realized she wasn't home and that she was still wearing her clothes from the day before. Her clothes reeked of stale alcohol and she had a hangover from hell.

She slowly got up and walked out of the room trying to figure out where she was. She walked down the hallway and ran into a familiar face. Her head hurt and she didn't want to think about the night before.

"Leo…" Haruka managed to get out in a raspy voice. Alexis looked up at the blond. Apparently Haruka didn't recall anything from last night.

"You don't remember do you?" Alexis looked at Haruka with a stern gaze, "You caused such chaos and you don't recall?"

"Chaos…?" Haruka replied trying to remember the events from the night before.

"Leo is in her room down the hall to the right." Alexis said pointing the way knowing that Haruka was a bit lost.

Haruka walked down the hallway now realizing she had spoken to Alexis her other cousin. She reached the door, but didn't know what to say for herself. she knew from Alexis' tone of voice she did something terrible. The only thing she could do is offer her apologies for disrespecting a home that wasn't her own.

Leo lay there in silence unknowing that Michiru had heard everything. Leo placed a kiss on Michiru's forehead and whispered, "I love you."

Michiru felt like crying, but she held it in. She stirred pretending she was asleep and just now waking up.

"Wake up sleepy head." Leo said with a light chuckle. Michiru opened her eyes and smiled at the tomboy.

"Good morning Leo."

"How did you sleep? I hope I didn't kick you while I slept, I'm not used to sharing a bed with anyone." Leo said with a laugh, yet Leo's words as innocent as they were, reminded Michiru of the fact Leo has always been alone.

"I slept fine… thank you for letting me sleep here." came Michiru's quiet voice.

"Hey it was no problem."

Unknowing to the both of them Haruka was on the other side of the door. Leo heard a light knocking on the door, she simply assumed Alexis wanted to talk some more and simply said "Come in."

Haruka opened the door and walked in surprised to see Michiru in bed with none other than Leo, her own cousin. She stood there in silence and her teal eyes shone with disbelief as she stared directly into Michiru's blue eyes. How could she? Michiru… her Michiru had slept with her own cousin.

Michiru was shocked to find out it was Haruka who was at the door. She knew the position that her and Leo were in looked wrong, but for that moment in time she didn't care. For some reason unknown to her it didn't matter if Haruka had seen her lying there with Leo. She wasn't the racer's property.

"I think I came in at a wrong time." the tomboy said wanting to turn around and leave.

"No, it's okay. Did you need something?" Leo asked innocently.

"I just wanted to apologize for whatever it is I did last night."

Michiru embraced Leo as she spoke, "It's fine, don't worry about it."

"You should have breakfast with us." Leo suggested unknowing that Michiru wanted Haruka out of the room.

"No it's okay I need to get going. My career is about to end if I keep being late." with that said the blond tomboy made her way out of Leo's room.

'I can't believe this…how long have they been together?' Haruka thought to herself.

All of this time Haruka had hoped that Michiru continued to love her. She didn't want Michiru as a rebound. But she hoped that even after all this time the violinist might give her a chance. With her hopes broken, the tomboy left her cousin's house and headed for the track. Alone once again to face her inner demons.

* * *

A/N: I know it's taken me forever and that this chapter is really short. I'm currently working on polishing the remaining chapters to this fic. Gomen nasai for taking so long. God only knows I've been trying to finish it, but so many things have come up. I've moved 6 times and lost most of my data so I had to start from scratch. Anyways, thank you for reading, please R&R. BTW The Guardian will be updated soon.


	8. Show Time

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon or the songs so don't sue me I have no money. The songs used are _You Are My Home_ by Chayanne and Vanessa Williams, _Could I Have This Kiss Forever_ by Enrique Iglesias and Whitney Houston, and _Wedding Dress_ by Taeyang remixed in English by J. Reyez and Tommy C.

A/N: I know it's been a while and I do apologize for the excessively long delay. As a side note, lyrics in plain **bold font **are in translated to English. The chapter will seem a little long because of the concert, but I hope you enjoy it.

* * *

Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Chapter 7: Show Time

Things were running hectic all morning; first with Haruka's presence in Leo's room and next with guys coming in and out of Leo's house with music equipment and luggage. In the middle of all this confusion Michiru approached who she believed was Leo.

"Leo what's all this for?"

The tomboy looked at her a bit displeased and brought her aside, "First off, I'm not Leo. Second, in case you didn't know Leo and I are the lead vocalists in the band RLK and _we_ are going to be performing at the concert hall tonight."

Michiru sighed and rubbed her temple, "Tonight? That's the charity concert…Why didn't she tell me about this sooner?"

Alexis was motioning the guys to take things down stairs, and then turns to Michiru and laughs, "You should've known that we were your special guests at the concert hall. It's been posted for weeks now."

"I'm performing tonight with the orchestra tonight. So we're performing together?"

Alexis nods and smirks, "And afterwards, home sweet home."

Michiru felt her stomach sink, "Y-you're returning to Spain? What about Leo?"

"Leo's going back as well. What? You didn't think we'd be here forever did you?" Alexis was a smart ass and she always knew what to say to hurt someone.

"No, I-I just thought she'd be staying longer." Michiru's voice was but a whisper.

"No she won't be. Besides not like you really care. Now stop wasting my time. There is one last rehearsal before the concert tonight." Alexis' words struck her cold and the tomboy walked off.

Michiru stood there for a moment then rushed back upstairs and locked herself in Leo's room. She sat on the bed and began to cry. Leo was leaving again, but this time it broke her heart. It shattered her to pieces on the inside. Last night she felt loved and alive for the first time in her life, and now it was going all away.

The young violinist felt confused, her emotions were a jumbled mess. In the past her heart would have screamed out for Haruka's touch for it to be her last night who she lay with, but now things had changed. She was in Leo's bed last night and she still had Leo's scent lingering on her skin. Michiru never thought she'd find herself in this predicament. Haruka meant…she meant nothing more than a friend now…but Leo…in these past months has shown her a completely new aspect of life. The tomboy has lifted her spirits and comforted her in these difficult months. Those innocent emotions seemed to be evolving into something more than those of just simple friendship…

Leo sat in the middle of the auditorium where the charity concert was to be held. Sound and light technicians made the finishing touches to ensure the concert would go as smooth as possible. The stage was set for one last rehearsal before tonight's event and Leo was far too distracted to keep focused on everything around her.

Michiru had slept in her bed with her last night and it took all of her discipline and will power to not steal a kiss from those soft lips which she dreamed of for so long. Michiru's scent was of a soft ocean breeze that lingered in her senses. She loved the violinist for so long, but she knew nothing would come of it.

'Even if for some miracle she was to one day love me in return. How could I live knowing I hurt Haruka with such betrayal? I know she isn't entirely of my blood, but we were raised as if we were, therefore…Why am I thinking like this? Michiru loves Haruka, not me. If only Haruka could realize she is Michiru's true love… when that happens I will return to Spain where I belong.'

Her thoughts were interrupted by her cell phone ringing. Frustrated she answered the phone, "Hello."

"Leo, are you busy?"

Leo's attitude changed as soon as she heard the voice on the other line, "Hey Michi. No I'm not really busy, just finishing a few things then I'll be on my way back. Is something wrong?"

"No, but when you have the chance… could I talk to you privately.." Michiru seemed nervous, but Leo didn't know why.

"Sure, give me thirty minutes and I should be home."

"Okay."

"See you in a little bit." Leo closed the phone and wrapped up everything and headed towards her car. Leo had a strange feeling and she felt concerned about Michiru. The tomboy got into her car and made her way home. Reaching her destination, Leo parked her car and sat there a moment taking a deep breath hoping to straighten out her thoughts. Once she felt ready to face Michiru, Leo got out of her car and walked into her house being careful not to trip over anything. The tomboy tugged at her tie loosening it to relieve some tension and as Michiru was not downstairs, Leo silently made her way upstairs towards her bedroom.

Reaching her door she lightly knocked before walking in. "Michi it's me."

"It's your room, you can come in…" Michiru stood in the balcony, leaning on the stone ledge, looking down at the rose garden in the backyard.

Leo walked towards the violinist until she was standing next to her. "You wanted to talk to me."

Michiru nodded her gaze remaining on the garden below, "You are leaving again…aren't you?"

Leo's gaze fell to the floor feeling guilty for not telling her. 'How did she…' she thought.

The tomboy cleared her throat, "Unfortunately, I have to."

'She said _unfortunately_ meaning she doesn't want to go, but she has to.' Michiru thought silently.

"Why do you have to go? Isn't it your choice?" Michiru asked boldly.

Leo let out a deep breath, "It's not my choice…it's my father's…again…"

Knocking on the door interrupted their conversation. "Who is it?" Leo said in an aggravated manner.

Alexis' voice came through the door, "Leo I'm headed out for rehearsal. By the way Araceli's replacement is here. I'm sure you'll like her when you meet her."

"Alright."

Alexis chuckled, "See you at rehearsal." with that said footsteps could be heard walking away and heading downstairs.

"Potentials…" Leo whispered as she left the balcony and made her way to her closet to change. Michiru stood their confused as to what was going on and why the tomboy suddenly became so frustrated. Her own emotions were a whirlpool and she didn't know how to act on the feelings she was hiding from herself and Leo. Her attention return to the Spaniard that quickly stormed back into the bedroom removing her tie and undoing her shirt. The tomboy quickly went into the closet picking out sets of clothing and packing them into a duffle bag.

"You were saying?" Leo said breaking the silence.

"When are you leaving?" Michiru's voice sounded hurt.

The tomboy stopped what she was doing and looked down at the duffle bag. Letting out a breath she forced her gaze up locking with those deep pools of blue. "Once I finish with everything that I have pending here. Alexis and everyone will go back by next week."

Michiru felt a little alleviated, but she still didn't know how long Leo's pending business would last. Silence filled the room again except for the light rustling of clothes being placed in the duffle bag. "You wouldn't leave without telling me? Would you?" the questions slipped out of her mouth without thinking.

The tomboy stopped and walked over to her taking her in a warm loving embrace, "No. I wouldn't do that to you."

Leo leaned to give Michriu a kiss on the cheek, but was surprised when she felt soft silky lips on her own. Leo hesitated at first not wanting to give in to her own emotions, but all that was forgotten when Michiru's hands wrapped behind her neck pulling her in closer. Leo's tongue wanted entrance into Michiru's mouth, which Michiru gave willingly. Tongues fought over dominance and the kiss more passionate. Michiru moaned as she surrendered herself in Leo's arms, her hands tracing the tomboy's torso feeling the hard muscles hidden underneath the shirt. They broke the kiss Michiru gasping for breath and blushing.

Leo's heart was pounding so hard it seemed as if it would break through her ribcage if it were possible. Neither of them knew what to say, but the look Michiru gave her was different this time. It held something Leo could not decipher and before she knew it Michiru pulled her into another kiss, this time slow and soft. Leo's hands traveled down Michiru's sides and rested on her hips. This kiss was waking up a forbidden desire in Leo. The tomboy's sense of reason awakened along with a horrible guilt.

'What are you doing? This isn't how you are going to get Haruka and Michiru together.' reluctantly Leo broke from the kiss, her eyes

"I-I'm s-sorry, I shouldn't have…." the violinist was now nervous and looking away from the tomboy. Leo knew this shouldn't have happened, but felt at a loss of words to say. She didn't want to make Michiru feel worse than she already did. The Spaniard felt a slight relief when her cell phone went off. Michiru stood there quiet and rethinking her actions, while listening to the tomboy's one-sided phone conversation. The violinist searched within herself for guilt and regret, but found none. She felt warm and she felt a sudden craving to kiss the tomboy again. Michiru stepped back into reality when Leo ended her call.

"Michiru…I need to head back to the concert hall…" the tomboy seemed a little distant as if choosing her words carefully.

"W-would you mind…if I came along…I need to grab some things from Haruka's place before the concert tonight."

The tomboy smiled slightly and nodded. Grabbing the duffle bag, Leo stepped out of her room with Michiru following close behind.

Despite being late for the last rehearsal Michiru and Leo managed to get ready in time. Michiru took her place among the orchestra on the stage, the audience seats still empty with echoes of people running back and forth getting ready. The conductor raised his hands and motioned for them to begin. Michiru played the notes absentmindedly as she saw Leo came out from backstage first showing the new potential performer the choreography for the songs that were to be performed. A dark unfamiliar feeling crept on her, and not really knowing why, Michiru resented the closeness Leo and the new girl were displaying through dancing.

The tomboy walked up to the conductor and the orchestra was silenced. Both individuals stepped aside to converse privately about the concert. Nodding the conductor walked back and rehearsal was resumed. Michiru deciding to focus on anything other than Leo, opted to carefully pay attention to the music she was playing. Some pieces seemed sad yet romantic, and she couldn't help but wonder what the pieces would actually sound like with the group singing.

Masara was on stage holding hands with Alexis, who obviously had taken action and found a way to distinguish both twins. The solution was blonde highlights, not too exaggerated, but now one could tell which twin was who. Not that their personalities wouldn't be enough to give it away. Leo stepped to the center of the stage and motioned the dancers and everyone excluding the orchestra to "horseshoe" around her. Everyone remained quiet listening as Leo spoke. The aqua haired violinist drew her attention to the tomboy speaking, this time overly observing of the tomboy's Spanish European accent. Soon Leo dismissed everyone to finish preparing.

The orchestra and RLK were waiting patiently behind closed curtains as they could hear people filling the seats. Leo took in a deep breath messing with her button up shirt and looking at her slacks. Nervousness was slightly evident, but the tomboy collected her reserve and remained still the sounds of people grew louder and the seats were full. The curtains were pulled back to reveal RLK and its members along with Tokyo's Symphonic Orchestra (TSO).

The clapping grew louder and a young man from RLK was the first to speak into the microphone, "Welcome everyone. We are pleased to be with you all on this wonderful evening. RLK has prepared a special performance as we are joined tonight by no other than TSO. Thank you all for coming and making this charity concert possible. I now give you RLK and their newest member Pamela!"

Leo and the new girl stood center stage. The tomboy spoke with her husky accent, "Who here has been in love?" The crowd replied in unison excited. Leo looked at the girl standing next to her before speaking into the microphone again, " This first song that Pamela and I will perform is called _You Are My Home_." The crowd grew wild as the band and the orchestra began to play and Leo and Pamela began to dance to the music before Leo began singing into the microphone.

Leo:

**All of my life**

**I have been searching**

**For someone to find me**

**I have been looking**

**Waiting for your arms**

**To hold me**

Pamela:

**You took me**

**In from the cold**

**And out of the dark**

**You have taken me**

**Into your heart**

Leo and Pamela:

**You are my home**

**You are the one that I come to**

**You are the shelter I run to**

**I look in your eyes and I know**

**You're my home**

**You're my home**

Leo:

**You were the light in the window**

**When I couldn't find my way**

**You led my heart to**

**A warm tender place**

**Here beside you**

Pamela:

**You're where I always will be**

**And you're where I belong**

**I've been looking for you**

**For so long**

This far into the song and the duo had begun dancing to the song in a more seducing manner. The closeness between Leo and this Pamela girl unnerved Michiru because the girl in Leo's arms seemed to be enjoying the close contact more than she should.

Leo and Pamela:

**You are my home**

**You are the one that I come to**

**You are the shelter I run to**

**To keep me safe from the cold**

**Safe from the bold**

**Baby you're my home**

**You are my home**

**You are the love **

**That completes me**

**You are the touch**

**That has freed me**

**Now I look in your eyes**

**And I know**

**You are my home**

**And I'll never be alone**

**You are my home**

**You are the love **

**That completes me**

**You are the touch**

**That has freed me**

**Now I look in your eyes**

**And I know**

**You are my home**

Leo:

**Never have to be alone**

**Be alone baby**

**Baby you're my home**

Pamela:

**Never have to be alone**

Leo:

**Never have to be**

Pamela was now standing in front of the tomboy, with Leo's arm around her waist. Michiru continued playing trying to ignore what she was seeing.

Pamela:

**Never have to be…**

**The look in your eyes…**

Leo's voice had become very deep and husky whisper almost portraying a hidden lust as the tomboy sang into the other girl's ear.

Leo:

**Te miro a los ojos y me haces sentir…**

When the song ended the audience was clapping and cheering as the pair bowed and left the stage. Alexis and Masara sang a song in all Spanish that Michiru couldn't understand, but nonetheless the song had a wonderful tone. The violinist's mind wasn't all there until Leo and Pamela reemerged joining Alexis and Masara on stage to perform the next song, _Could I Have This Kiss Forever._

By this time, Michiru couldn't stand Pamela and Leo being so close. She understood that it was a professional environment, that it meant nothing. At least, she hoped it meant nothing to the tomboy. The violinist couldn't tear her eyes away from the tomboy and she could barely push down the feelings of jealousy as the song ended.

Both pairs bowed and Leo and Pamela once again left the stage followed by Alexis. Masara and another member of the band performed two songs that were more upbeat and quite different. The concert continued with more duets and solos. After a mixture of upbeat songs with complex choreography the concert was drawing to an end. The audience never faltered with its excitement as each new song was performed.

Finally, Leo reappeared and spoke to the audience, "The final song for this evening is a song that carries a meaning that romantics, such as myself, can relate to. My final song to all of you is a song called Wedding Dress." Mostly girls in the audience screamed louder than ever and the audience slowly quieted down as the piano played the song's first notes. Before singing into the mike, Leo looked at her twin took a small breath then looked back up to the audience and began to sing.

**Never should've let you go  
Never found myself at home  
Ever since that day that you walked  
Right out the door**

**You were like my beating heart  
That I, I can't control  
Even though we've grown apart  
My brain can't seem to let you go**

**Thinking back to the old times  
When you kept me up late at night  
We use to mess around  
Laugh and play, fuss and fight  
**

**I guess its too late, I'm dancing this dance alone  
This chapter's done, the story goes on**

**Baby  
Can't believe that you are not with me  
'Cause you should be my lady  
All I want is to set your heart free  
**

**But if you believe that you belong with him  
Promise me, you wont let anyone hurt you  
Remember, I will always be here for you  
Even if it kills me to see you**

**In that wedding dress  
Oh see you in that wedding dress  
See you in that wedding dress  
Oh see you in that wedding dress  
**

**Snappin' out this misery  
Depression this ain't me  
But I always turn around  
180 degrees**

**You got control of me  
And I, I cant explain  
Somebody call 911 emergency  
Before I go insane**

**Since you've moved on  
You took a piece of me give it back  
So much pain in my chest  
Blacking out, heart attack  
**

**I guess its too late, I'm dancing this dance alone**

**It's too late…  
**

**Baby  
Can't believe that you are not with me  
'Cause you should be my lady  
All I want is to set your heart free  
**

**But if you believe that you belong with him  
Promise me, you wont let anyone hurt you  
Remember, I will always be here for you  
Even if it kills me to see you**

**In that wedding dress  
Oh see you in that wedding dress  
See you in that wedding dress  
Oh see you in that wedding dress**

Alexis joined her sister and rapped a part of the song.

**And I see you with your man and it's hard to understand  
If we belong, if I did you wrong, where we even began  
We would always fuss and fight and it seems nothing was right  
But I loved you girl and you were my world but you'd never trust this guy  
'Cause the things I do when I'm on the stage, they say I'm a superstar  
You couldn't understand all the female fans and then we grew apart  
And I just don't get when you're acting like some other person  
But I try my best to hold on at the times when it ain't working  
And every time that you say it's over it breaks my heart and I don't know why  
'Cause you've done it a lot of times in the past but I get back up and try  
You said we could work it out, how could you hurt me now  
And you moved on to the next, I'm left with an imperfect smile  
**

After Alexis' part Leo finished out the song.

**But if you believe that you belong with him  
Promise me, you wont let anyone hurt you  
Remember, I will always be here for you  
Even if it kills me to see you**

**In that wedding dress  
Oh see you in that wedding dress  
See you in that wedding dress  
Oh see you in that wedding dress**

**Oh no…**

The audience cheered and clapped. RLK and TSO came together thanking the audience. After taking a bow the curtains closed behind everyone as they all walked backstage. Michiru was quite amazed on how everything went well. Just as she turned around to go change she bumped into Leo.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bump into you like that." the tomboy said in a thick husky Spanish accent.

"It's okay. Leo listen I-" Michiru didn't finish her sentence as Leo leaned closer and placed a kiss on her cheek.

"You were amazing tonight Michiru."

The violinist remained speechless and as the tomboy began to pull away she wrapped her arms around Leo's neck and pulled her in a kiss. The kiss deepened and the pair quickly lost themselves in that single moment not noticing who was looking at them with hatred.

* * *

A/N: Again sorry for the delay. I'm working on the next chapter to this as we speak (not literally speaking). I was going to leave this in hiatus for a bit along with The Guardian, which I am also working on. My friend asked me to finish this fic so you will be seeing more updates soon. R&R.


	9. Newfound Love, Guilt, and Heartache

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon, which means I don't own Haruka and Michiru.

A/N: Thanks for the reviews everyone, it feels good to be back. I've made a poll because I can't decided which of my fics to finish first, so if you could please take a minute to vote I'd appreciate it. Here's the next chapter, please enjoy.

* * *

Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely  
By: Sky King Haruka

Chapter 8: Newfound Love, Guilt, and Heartache

Haruka stood in the shadows watching Michiru and Leo kissing. The blonde tore her eyes away not able to bare watching anymore of it. The racer held the roses she had bought for the violinist with an iron grip and as she turned to walk away she threw them to the ground on her way out.

She was drowning in a sea of jealousy and betrayal. A part of her wanted to go back pull the couple apart and fight it out with her cousin, but her better judgment pushed her to leave things as they were. The drive home was uneventful except for her thoughts of what she saw transpire. Haruka felt deeply hurt, but she knew she had made her friend wait far too long. Could she really blame her for moving on? A selfish side of her screamed that Michiru should have waited for her to come around, but the part of Haruka that recently awakened with love for Michiru wished nothing more than happiness for the violinist.

Taking a deep breath the blonde changed directions and steered towards the coast in hopes that maybe some fresh air could help alleviate some of her confusion. In her frustration she pulled over in a remote part of town. She couldn't go to the coast it reminded her to much of Michiru and her ocean blue eyes. Thoughts rushed through the racer's mind and she couldn't answer even the simplest of questions.

"Is this love? Or am I just jealous because I am no longer the center of her universe?" the frustration boiled through her as she punched her steering wheel.

'Get a grip Tenoh, you should be happy for her she's your friend and Leo loves her and has always loved her!' the voice in her head tried to be sense of reason, but her heart was screaming for something other than reason.

"No, no, no! I refuse! Leo can't have her…she's supposed to love me…" tears flowed from Haruka's teal eyes as she lost herself in grief. Pedestrians walked by looking at the distressed "young man" in the car but their concerned glances went unnoticed by the blonde.

Haruka's conscious made for one more round of torment, 'You were the one that pushed her away all those years ago! You knew she loved you! And now you waited forever and as you waited you lost her. There is no one to blame but yourself. You can't blame her or Leo if they have found the happiness they deserve! You blew it Tenoh! I told you a long time ago that she was the one, but you've realized it too late.'

As much as Haruka wanted to call her own conscious a cruel pretentious liar she knew the annoying voice in her head was right. Michiru was lost to her now, she could try to fight , but chances were there was no point. After her crying subsided, Haruka drove to the nearest bar to drown her sorrows.

* * *

Leo's home seemed like a reunion hall. Band members and old friends had gathered there after the concert to speak with the twins in regard to upcoming projects and concerts. As busy as the 'guys' were they didn't notice when Michiru and Masara walked outside..

"So, what's bothering you?" Masara's question was to the point catching Michiru slightly off guard. "We all saw you and Leo kissing, so I know you two and the kissing isn't the problem."

Michiru let out a slight breath looking up to the night sky above, "You're right…it isn't…"

The brunette sat on the bench in the gazebo watching Michiru's movements. The more she looked at the girl in front of her the more she couldn't help but feel bad for her. Alexis was very hard and cruel on Leo's love interest, but unlike Alexis, Masara wasn't one-sided on anything. She befriended the violinist despite her fiancée's wishes knowing very well that there was more to this than Leo and Alexis would admit to her.

"Masara, I'm confused. All this time I thought I was in love with Haruka, that she was my world and my everything. A part of me hoped that after she found her place in the world again, that maybe we could…have something," Michiru closed her eyes tears falling silently down her pale cheeks, "but then, everything changed, when…" silence reigned and Masara spoke up.

"When Leo came back." Masara finished for her.

"The more time I spent with Leo the more I felt guilty for letting her go the first time. Leo has always loved me, but I was to into myself and my obsession for Ruka to realize that Leo was sincere. Who am I kidding? I knew she was sincere….but…I was scared." Michiru shook slightly with silent sobs as she pushed herself to let out everything that had been eating at her these past months.

Masara stood up and walked next to where Michiru was wrapping her arm around the violinist's shoulders, "You were young back then. No one expected you to settle down and make big plans at that age."

"I know, but all that time passed I spent it chasing a false fantasy. Now, Leo is in my life and I find out she is leaving for Spain again…that she will be leaving me again and I don't know when I will see her…" Michiru was sobbing hard into the brunette's shoulder, "I don't know what I'm feeling anymore…Am I in love?…I don't even know what love feels like…I don't know where to go from here, but I don't want her to leave…"

The brunette held the smaller woman tighter and tried to comfort her as an older sister would, she went through something similar years ago before having to decide between Alexis and her ex-husband. "Tell me, when you found out she was leaving again, what did you feel?"

"I felt empty, it felt like the air was too thick to breathe. I could feel my heart breaking into a million pieces at the thought of having to watch her leave again. Just thinking about it hurts more than I can bare." Michiru was being honest not only to Masara, but to herself.

The brunette released her hold on Michiru, "Not that long ago I had to make a decision. I was married when I met Alexis. After my one year anniversary with my husband I realized I was quickly falling for her, and despite what my family or anyone said I filed for divorce just to stay with her. I guess what I am trying to tell you is that love is unpredictable, but when it finds you seize it and fight with every part of you to keep that love. Alexis and I have fought for our love time and time again."

"I didn't know that…Did you ever love him?" the question slipped Michiru's lips without thinking.

"No, I didn't. It was an arranged marriage you, but despite that I had hoped that love would eventually come; it never did. I refused consummating the marriage because I felt nothing for him. It's strange, because when we first met it seemed like there was a connection, but as soon as those papers were signed there was nothing."

Michiru nodded and looked up at the night sky, "If love is as unexpected as you say…then I fell in love with Leo when she came back into my life…but I was simply too blind to see it."

Masara smiled in the darkness, she could she Michiru's eyes light up at the memory. "I'm not here to judge you or anything, but what about Haruka? How do you feel about her?"

Michiru looked at her friend and took a deep breath, "She's my friend Masara, and for a time I did love her. Now when I think about her I feel friendship and nothing else. Even as a friend I feel so distant and estranged from her, but I feel no need to seek closeness to her anymore."

"I understand. I hope your heart shows you the way and you make the right choice for yourself. Just know I wish you happiness with whomever you choose. We should get back inside. We've all had a long eventful day, wouldn't you agree?" Masara laughed as Michiru blushed. Both girls walked back towards the house, Michiru confessing her jealousy regarding Pamela. The brunette giggled and assured her friend she had nothing to worry about. Once inside the girls found Leo alone sitting on the piano bench playing the music in front of her. The tomboy looked like she was concentrating on the melody quietly singing in Spanish, mostly to herself. Masara tapped Leo's shoulder once her hands left the piano keys. "Where's Alexis?"

The tomboy looked up from the music sheets in front of her, "She's waiting for you upstairs."

"Well, I'll see you both in the morning. Goodnight." with those last words Masara turned around heading back upstairs and to her room where her lover waited for her.

Leo turned to face Michiru and motioned the violinist to take a seat next to her, which she did only to snuggle closer to the tomboy. The tomboy felt guilt as she wrapped arm around Michiru's shoulders.

"What were you doing?" the aqua haired girl asked tracing Leo's forearms with feather touches, breaking the tomboy out of her self-guilt.

Leo swallowed thickly, "Learning a new song, it's called _Amor Inmortal_. It means immortal love."

"It sounds beautiful, even if it is in Spanish."

Leo looked at the music in front of her and smiled a little, "I could translate it as I play, it might not be perfect, but I could do it. Better yet, I know you're tired you should go to bed."

The aqua haired girl locked eyes with the tomboy, "I'm not sleepy yet. Sing it for me please, the way you were singing it before with no translation…" Michiru's voice was but a whisper that only Leo could hear.

The tomboy nodded and began playing while singing quietly so only Michiru could hear. The smaller woman was swept away to a fantasy world as she closed her eyes and imagined what an immortal love would be like as Leo played the piano and sang quietly into her ear. Even though the song was in a foreign language, she could feel the love the words held.

As Leo finished the song, Michiru traced Leo's jaw line with her finger and looked lovingly at the tomboy that was serenading her. Without a second thought the aqua haired beauty pulled the Spaniard into a slow passionate kiss. Tongues explored and tasted familiar territory. The tomboy instinctively pulled Michiru closer which caused the smaller girl to moan. They continued kissing until they had to break the kiss for air, but they remained in each other's embrace.

Sensing the tomboy's doubts Michiru broke the silence while gently caressing the tomboy's chest, "Leo…what are you thinking about?"

"I just don't think this is what you really want." Leo let out a deep sigh, but still held Michiru, "I know what I feel for you, but I don't think you feel-" the violinist pressed a finger to Leo's lips silencing the tomboy's protests.

"You don't know what I feel when I'm with you…Leo if you leave to never come back you will break my heart because-"

The tomboy hid her gaze and barely speaking above a whisper, "Please don't say that…unless it's true…"

An undefined fire burned in Michiru's eyes, "I love you Leo." before Leo could react they were kissing again and their position on the piano bench was becoming most uncomfortable. Every thread of discipline told the tomboy to stop, but the love and desire for the woman in her arms burned away every protest. Every kiss set her on fire and every caress from Michiru's hands wiped away any doubt.

Without thinking the boyish Spaniard carried Michiru upstairs into her bedroom and gently laid her on the bed. Lips met once again in feverish kisses that begged to unleash hidden passions while hands ached to be released on heated skin. A soft moan escaped Michiru's lips when Leo's mouth planted kisses on her neck down to her collarbone.

'What are you doing?' Leo's conscious screamed at her and in that instant she stopped and looked into Michiru's eyes. The violinist looked confused and hurt, she wanted nothing more than to hold the precious girl beneath her and give her all the love she deserved, but she knew this wasn't right.

"Leo…d-did I…did I do something wrong?"

Stormy eyes looked in to Michiru's deep pools of blue, "No you didn't do anything wrong. I-I just…I love you and respect you Michiru, but…" the tomboy's conscious was to loud in her head for her to hear her own thoughts. "we need to take things slow. I don't want you do something you will regret later."

'You are a bloody idiot! Tell her, that it isn't right because you know she belongs with Haruka! Even though you're dying to make love to her you can't because she is off limits!'

Michiru's lips formed a smile before kissing the tomboy above her again, this time the kiss was slow, but despite this it made it more arousing. Leo held her close even after the kiss ended. Michiru's eyes closed as she fell asleep in her lover's arms. Dreaming of happier days that were to come.

This wasn't the same for the Spaniard, as her conscious repeated the same question over and over again, 'What will you do when your time is almost up?' Leo's eyes closed listening to Michiru's quiet breathing. Opening them once again she gathered her courage and whispered, "I will make sure she is with Haruka long before that happens."

Hearing no more annoying rants of guilt and damnation, the tomboy fell into an uneasy sleep filled with nightmares about her inevitable future.

* * *

A/N: I'm hoping this chapter isn't too disappointing. As always please R&R, and if you could vote on the poll I just posted.


End file.
